Hole in One!

In homage to the great Bernard Cribbins, please find attached below for your delectation and delight, the Pixie and the Prof's reimagining of his hit "Hole in the Ground", the Hungry Earth Remix


There I was, a-drilling this hole
A hole in the ground, so big and sort of round it was
And there was I, drilling it deep
Couldn’t see the bottom and the sides were steep
When along comes this bloke in a bow-tie, which he wiggled then scratched his head
Well he looked down the hole, poor demented soul and he said

"Do you mind if I make a suggestion?

Don't drill there, drill it elsewhere
You’re drilling right down to a Silurian lair
The size of it's wrong, it's much too long
And you can’t drill a hole where a hole don't belong"

I ask, what a liberty, eh?
Nearly bashed him right in the bow-tie

Well there was him, next to me hole
Scanning the earth for all that he was worth
There was her, standing right there
Sucked underground in a flash of red hair
So I gave him a look sort of sideways and I leaned on my drill-bit and sighed
Well I lit me a fag and having took a drag I replied

I just couldn’t bear, to drill it elsewhere
I'm drilling right down ‘cos I don’t really care
And if you disagree it doesn't bother me
That’s the place where the hole’s gonna be

Well there we were, discussing this hole
A hole in the ground, so big and sort of round it was
Well it's not there now, the ground’s all flat
And beneath it is the Doctor that’s played by Matt

And that's that

Or the alternative ending…

Well it’s not there now, it’s right out of whack,
All thanks to Amy and her temporal crack

Or (ahem) the other alternative ending...

Well it's not there now, the Earth's all gone
Now we're under the rule of a big Reptilion